She didn’t affirmatively say no.

Those words are part of the defence argument in a US rape trial where the victim was drugged and drunk and raped. Tracey Spicer deals with it here.

Up until now, I thought silence meant no. But because of this landmark defence I am wiser and more empowered as a man!

Quite apart from the new found licence it gives me to burn, pillage and rape, I could have led a happier life.

I could have gone out as much as I liked as a teenager. Well Mum and Dad didn’t affirmatively say no. They said ask the other parent!

I could have taken more time off at work. The boss hasn’t yet replied to my leave application. He or she hasn’t affirmatively said no. I’m out of here!

I could have had more fun while married. If I want to do something and silence is the answer, it’s encouragement isn’t it. After all she hasn’t affirmatively said no to what I’ve said or done.

And these are three ordinary examples of silence as consent. There are easily many many others.

What a beautiful world we could create if we assumed silence was consent!  All I need is someone to not affirmatively say no.

Silence means NO!